Mahatma Ghandi

This book was nominated to the Augustprice in 2008, n I can see why.
It is VERY well written, really! Woow!
You have to read it! Zac is amazing. Ghandi is amazing!!!
I have always been facinated by Ghandi. He is one of the coolest people that ever existed.
Ghandi is a big rolemodel for me.
Fantastic! Brilliant! Superdupercool!

Ever since I was a child, my dream has been to one day be a big person.
A person dat can be compared to Ghandi.
I dont need to be famous, working in politics like he did or anything.
Just in my own way.
I wanna be able to see the beauty in every person.
I want to see them for who they are.
Remember them.
Let them into my heart.
Apritiate them.
I wanna be thankful for everything I recieve,
and give without expecting anything back.
I want them to see my love for them shine through my eyes.
I wanna be a hand to hold when they try to raise.
I want to be their rock.
But before I do that, I want to be own rock.
I want to grow so high I'll be more afraid to fall then to fly.
I wanna be a fighter with a strong mind and inspire people to fight.
I wanna stand up for justice.
That's my dream, that's what keeps me going.
I will get there one day... I have to believe in that.
But now, I'm not evan close.
One day.

Love

Good bye my lover.

Evan I before said I didnt want much contact wit Demba, he called again.
Everytime he does, everytime I hear his voice...I'm back.
It makes me feel so close to him, it makes me feel calm n safe.
But I know it doesnt work, cuz everytime I am also hurting.
I know I hav to leave him behind me.
But it is so hard...I said it is over like one thousend times now.
I feel so silly.
Is jus that...I was so in love!!
I was naiv enough to believe that it would be you n me always.
I thought that you would always be there for me, n I would always be there for you.
Never hav I felt so close to anyone.
I loved you so damn much.
I never saw it coming.
Why couldnt u jus hav been real??
I miss having you beside me so much.
Often I manage to pretend I dont care, but of course I do.
You will always, always, always hav a part of my heart.
I know it doesnt seam like it, but I came so far on the way to let you go.
It took me so long to get were I am now.
I am ok without you.
But you keep coming back...
You cant do that!
I will never give you the chance to hurt me again. Ever.
Thats why, I called you to say good-bye. Again.
It is supposed to be a final one.
A no-more-contact-at-all-one.
You cried.
I cried.
I didnt want to.
But I had to.
I'm sorry my stupid tiger...
In a way I still love you.
But I have to leave you behind me now! I HAVE TO!
Please, please help me to be strong enough...
Please! PLEASE!!!

Lucky

About a month ago I called Demba n said I didnt wanna be wit him again n dat I am fo sure not coming to Gambia.
N today, I went on facebook n saw a picture wit him walkin wit someone. Den I saw, it was Eva... My heart jus stopped beating.
Crap... SHE is wit him in Gambia. THEY will get married.
I deleted him on Facebook so I wouldnt hav to see anythin more.
How could she do that? How can she be so week?
This will hurt a short time, but I am ok.
I am happy I am not her, I'm happy I said no.
I'm happy I wont be the one he will keep hurting. Destroying.
I feel lucky.
Now is all over.

Love

I'm Moving In

I jus moved out from the appartment I shared wit my sister in Vällingby.
Now I stay wit my friend Filippa in Brandbergen, I rent a room at her place.
Is cool so far! :)
She stayes wit her twins Aeon and Atreyu. And her boyfriend and sister spends a lot of time there.
It felt shit I had to move from Vällingby but I kinda like it here. Is nice, a lot of action!
I stay in the childrens playroom, haha is very cute! :) The wall is painted like a castle.

I told Demba some time ago that I didnt wanna hav much contact wit him also. It was hard to do it, but I am proud of myself.
I feel free now, still miss him though.
It was for sure the best thing to do.
Dont feel angry wit him...I truly wish him the best.
I hope he will treat his next lady better...

Love

To Cheat Or Not To Cheat, Dat's The Damn Question.

If I tell my story, my listeneres think you are the biggest ashole.
A liar, a hor, a backstabber.
I can feel like that when I'm angry wich is not often. But maybe I should be angry! I know I have the right to be. I guess I am too nice, too understanding. And too damn naiv.
But you know what? I'm done.

Cuz I learned dat when theres nothin more u can get from me, you don't care.
I'm done caring too.

What you did was no mistakes, you put up a fight to make it happen. All for you.
You selfish, greedy, cruel, nasty lil sun of a bitch!
I got no respect for you left.

You remember dis picture... dat I took on you when you were sleeping. If I look at it dis times I cry. Cuz I remember exactly how I felt in dis moment.
I admired you. I was so thankful I had you der. Nothin had ever been so beautiful to me.
I tried to capture your beauty on the camera, I was gettin angry cuz it didnt work.
Like I was afraid it would disapear. And it did.

I've been trying to understand you. I want to know how you think, how you look at it. I hav jus not been able to believe that you are not what I thought you were. But I got no more nice words for you, cuz I'm done tryin.
This time I am really done. I've said it many times before, I know.
But this time, I'm able to let go. I'm done.
I don't need you. I will get there on my own. You'll see.


If you really love someone, how can she not be enough?
Why do you always hunger for more?
How can it be worth it?
Is it your ego dat needs dat?
Evan my valuues has changed a lot after everything that happend, I know for sure I would never ever hav done the same to you.
I felt so strongly dat I was only yours, my body belonged to you and I would never let anyone else touch it. But I guess you were never really mine.
How can you be so selfish....
Life is not a joke! You are hurting real people dat matters jus as much as you. So who the fuck are you...what gives you the right?
Why is your ego n sexual needs more important then her?
Whats the point?

I'm So Done.

Love

Lovely Nemi

Hahaha Susan Boyle duuuuuude....

Lazy?

Haven't been writing in some time...
Maybe yeah, a bit cuz am lazy...
But also I had problems dat I hav been stressed out about.
N I'm tierd of writing about my problems here...come oooon.
Am such a crybaby...
All I look forward to now is to jus go to Africa...
Which will probably be on my own in jan-feb.
Am tierd of prosponding.
But I feel like is better I am sure of dat I hav enough $$$ so I can stay longer cuz after dis time I will probably not be able to go for years...
I look forward to my adventure. :)
So much...
To jus throw myself out there, meet new people, discover new places....
Being in my village. My home.
Love